Setting off on The Path today the words natural and at home come to mind. I am very relaxed. Before long, however, my mind is lost in thoughts about one thing or another and I realise despite this being a walking meditation I am all in my head. I decide whenever I notice this happening I could bring awareness to my feet and just focus on what I am feeling here in this part of my body. Even with wellies on I can sense the lay of the land and every bump and stone beneath my soles, but it does bring me back down to earth and I quickly regain a sense of ground. Cool!
Before long I am off again! Up in the air. This particular train of thought begins with me feeling compassion for someone in their suffering when, like a bolt from the blue, I am suddenly feeling deep shame wondering if their suffering is my fault in some way. There is no particular reason why it would be but nevertheless I am feeling horrified right now.
Thankfully I remember to lose my mind, as it were, and bring awareness back to my feet. As I take the very next step I glance down at the ground. It seems I am about to step on a hand grenade. In actual fact, it's just a pine cone half buried in the mud but the powerful symbology stays with me as I watch myself step right down on to it.
It occurs to me that the feelings of deep shame that we unconsciously allow to cycle around our heads have as much hidden, destructive potential as unwittingly stepping on a land mine or live grenade. Although it is healthy for shame to come up out of the shadows to be acknowledged, it is equally important to then release it. That is, let go of the shame. For to try and push it back down inside from whence it came is akin to swallowing a ticking time bomb and hoping it won't go off ;-)
Much Love and Joy and Happiness on Your Path xxx
Trained in a depth, buddhist-based psychotherapy, using everyday outer world experiences to develop inner wisdom, one day at a time.